Our Relationship With Numbers

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Have you (or anyone you know) ever stepped on a scale and had a negative emotional reaction?

Perhaps the negative emotion went as far as avoidance of the scale for fear of what we would feel if the number did not say what we “wanted” it to say?

Perhaps we actually ignored the scale and pretended that since the scale did not exist there was no such thing as body weight?

And then the reasons: “Well, I don’t really feel that the scale is for me because of my density.” “I don’t like looking at the scale, I feel good and it just makes me feel depressed.” “I eat pretty well and exercise, I don’t need a scale to tell me what to do.” From where did all of this come? How did we contort our brains into these kinds of gymnastics? In reality, the scale is only a tool for the simple measurement of weight, a number that describes an object’s mass relative to gravity. Where did all of these emotions come from? Here it is simply: meaning. The data from the scale seen through a lens of meaning causes an emotional response, which consequently determines a behavioral response. It is not the number, it is the meaning we give to the number that determines whether or not we have an empowered or disempowered response.

Here it is as a process:

DATA → LENS → EMOTION → BEHAVIOR

Consider some of the potential meaning – response pairings:

Notice how the last two examples, while sharing the same meaning could cause two totally different responses. Meaning and the resulting responses are highly subjective – all day long people look at the same data and give it completely different meanings, or give it the same meaning and respond to it in totally different ways.

This phenomenon of meaning cripples businesses when owners, leaders, and managers have an unhealthy relationship with the meaning of numbers. Perhaps they look at numbers and exhibit disempowered reactions to them, or perhaps the meaning they are already giving to the numbers keeps them from compiling and reviewing them in the first place. If we look at a number and feel disempowered by it, how likely are we to want to engage with it?

So, if you, or someone you are working with has a disempowered response to a piece of information, consider the following questions to get moving again. “I” and “you” are interchangeable.

What does the number measure?
What do I feel about the number?
What am I making that number mean?
What else could the number mean?
Which perspective could I choose?
When I choose that perspective, what will my response be?

So here it is in a nutshell: if you want to transform the relationship with any number, become aware of the meaning and choose a different meaning.

Remember, our perspective is up to us and there is no “right” way of seeing anything. A high degree of consciousness about meaning allows us to choose meanings that empower us and move towards goals and outcomes. I’m sure some of you have also realized that the mechanism of perspective applies to virtually every part of life beyond just the numbers, we will save the larger conversation for a future post. The world is a perceptual illusion, so pick one that works for you!